I’ve just found out my child has been bullying other kids at school — What should I do?

September 25, 2020

Finding out your child is bullying can be worrying and hurtful. No one wants to think of their child as a bully. Kids bully for many reasons, and the good news is that you can help your child stop bullying others.


Reasons Your Child May Bully Others

There are many reasons your child may bully. It does not mean your child is just a mean kid. Your child may be bullying to fit in with a group or may be getting bullied himself or herself.

Sometimes kids who bully are trying to get attention and haven’t yet learned how to get positive attention. Your child may be naturally more aggressive than other kids and hasn’t yet found the proper outlets.

In some cases, your child may have issues with low self-esteem. Bullying may be a way to cope and feel a sense of power.

If your child is young, he or she may not quite understand what the bullied child is feeling. Young kids have trouble feeling empathy or putting themselves in the place of others.

How to Help Your Child Stop Bullying

If your child is bullying, there are many ways to help him or her stop. You may want to start by talking to your child. Don’t accuse, and don’t merely punish. Instead, listen to your child to see what is going on. If you can get to the root of the behavior, you can figure out how to stop it.

father and son

In most cases, your response will depend on the reasons behind the bullying. If your child is trying to fit in with a crowd of kids who are encouraging him or her to bully, it is time for a serious talk about what makes a good friend. If your child is being bullied, it is time for you to speak with the school to get all bullying to stop.

If your child is bullying to get attention, try to figure out whose attention your child wants: another kid’s, the teacher’s or yours? You can then give your child strategies for getting positive attention. For example, if your child wants to be friends with another kid, roleplay asking that kid to join in for a game or sharing a treat may lead to a friendship.

If your child is struggling with aggression, you may need to seek counseling. In some cases, your kid just needs a better outlet. Sometimes playing a sport can be helpful.

In situations where your child has low self-esteem, explore avenues where your child can build confidence in a positive way. Your child may take up a new hobby or pursue an interest where he or she excels.

It is also essential for your child to understand what the bullied child may be feeling. Discuss the situation so that your child can begin to grasp just how their actions are impacting others.

Legal Obligations

When it comes to bullying, both the school and the parents of the children involved have legal obligations. If the school is not keeping the parents on both sides of the issue informed, then parents may wish to hire a lawyer.

If you are seeking Washington Education Lawyers, then an attorney from Albert Law can help. Education Lawyers in Seattle WA are trained in education counseling and can help your child get protection and help.


If your child is bullying other children, do not despair. There are ways to help your child stop bullying and become a happier and healthier kid. You can work through it together.

If you need Washington Education Attorneys to help with any legal issues you may be facing due to bullying, Albert Law can help. We are Education Attorneys in Seattle WA, and we have experience helping families deal with the legal situations regarding bullying.